The Plot... A cargo donkey train loaded with nuclear warheads has been hijacked by computer genius (Ed Harris). With the aid of a government chemical hacker, the NCRP hopes to intercept the pilfered technologies and return them to their owner. The ATF, with the aid of Hubert Botchwinch (Tom Cruise), must skateboard through the Swiss Alps to return the hijacked nuclear warheads safely to the Japanese military. As if this wasn't enough, he has only 5 weeks to do it. With the aid of a retired marine (Bruce Willis), the good guys must mountain bike through the rain forest to deliver the borrowed lethal poisonous gas promptly to the American government. All this worsens as he realises that his common law wife (Nicole Kidman) has been working for the evildoers. Also we have the screwball slapstick of a smart alec soul brother (Dave Chapelle) who when kidnapped by the evildoers says: "Wassup my niggas?" All this won't be easy seeing that a nosy reporter (Samuel L. Jackson) has secrets concerning his messy past. Just as our heroes are leaving on their suicidal mission, they stupidly join in on a sing-along of Love that Dirty Water much to the dismay of the CIA . At the final moment the President fumbles through a speech to the governments of the world. As this moment of truth happens he says: "Here we stand, at the dawn of a new tomorrow. Drop the bombs, Commander." A PETA weapons hacker in the crowd replies: "He better be right... for our sake." Coming next summer. Rated PG-13 Running time 134 minutes Directed by: Michael Bay Projected Critic Rating:

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