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The Plot... A train full of government secrets has been hijacked by the most dangerous terrorist in the world (Gene Hackman). With the assistance of a private chemical hacker, PETA hopes to reclaim the borrowed technologies and get them back to their owner. NASA, with the assistance of Austin Bracespeed (Nicholas Cage), must skateboard through the San Fransisco to return the hijacked thermo-nuclear explosives safely to the Japanese government. And if this wasn't enough, he has less than 5 days to do it. With the help of a grizzled navy seal (Jon Voight), our hero must mountain bike through the jungle to return the pilfered government secrets in a timely manner to the Icelandic military. All this worsens as he realises that his old flame (Angelina Jolie) has been kidnapped by the the villain. Along with this you see the zany tomfoolery of a sass-talking soul brother (Chris Tucker) who when captured by the the villain says: "What kinda FUCKED up place is this?!?!" All this will prove difficult because a cop with a vendetta (Robert DiNero) has information concerning his messy criminal record. Just as the good guys are departing on their perlious journey, they stupidly join in on a sing-along of Love that Dirty Water much to the disappointment of the FBI . At the final moment the President fumbles through a speech to the governments of the world. While this moment of truth happens he says: "When I took office, they never told me THIS would happen. Drop the bombs, Commander." An ATF weapons specialist in the crowd replies: "I hope god is on our side."
Coming next winter. Rated R Projected Critic Rating: |
