His companion nodded.2 His companion was a short, pudgy little fellow, whose red shiny cheeks peeked out like a shy parlormaid between the frame of a wiry ebony beard and weighty moustache. He stood no higher than the famous silver statue of the goddess Munt, which in turn was a scant five inches shorter than Melandria. So short and diminutive was he that the frame of the elf, of whom it is said that normally elves are shorter than most human, was a full three-quarters of a head taller than the pudgy gentleman, or the statue. This little fellow was sleepy-eyed and lazy-looking, and his wits had obviossly been dulled by excessive winebibbery, and he clearly could drink better than he could think. He was wearing predominantly blue.
The elven rascal patted his little companion on the noggin. "Methinks we should investigate, for I hear the clink of gold in that distant sound," he confided. "My elfin ears, inherited from my sylvan ancestry, allow me to know this."
"Mayhap there may be a tankard of mead at that place?" suggested his rotund compatriot, licking a pair of cherry-colored chops.
"Oh, Gauss, thou art a veritable wine cask," the elf chided. "Dost not the glimmer of gold shine more brightly than the glint of bubbles in a Gromporian wine?"
"Mayhap," responded the short chap addressed as Gauss, "but even thou must admit that the taste of gold leaves something to be desired, friend Halfnight."
"Thou hast me there," chortled the taller and slimmer one of the pair.
Thou shouldst stop reading this tripe and do your chores mow the lawn get a job fill up my gas tank ya bum!
1. My thanks to an alert reader, who pointed out that the ship which is here called a "sloop," which has one mast and is fore-and-aft rigged, is earlier called a "brig," or a two masted, square-rigged sailing vessel. What a gaffe! Obviously, the boat I was describing was neither a brig nor a sloop, but a "bligate," which is a class of frigate with a mainmast, a foremast, a top-jib-mast, and a tip-top-jib-blib-spanker-boom with nankeen sails, carronades and 32-pounders, that can sail three points closer to the wind than any other ship of Her Majesty's navy because the bumpkin-sprit is close-hauled. Thanks for catching my error, loyar reader!
1. Because, remember, he said something?[back]