Hell is Being Trapped in a Room with Your Friends or Whatever That Guy Once Said (and How he Said it)
A Dramatist's Interpretation
So, what do you want to do tonight, fellows?
A better question would be, (insert clever twist upon my words)
Yuh-huh. What about you, Mr. Holmes?
Leave me alone.
(shoots up cocaine)
Looks like it's just going to be another evening at home.
Ohhhh.... the ring grows heavy, Laura...
Bidibidibidi. Shut your pie-hole, small fry.
You lay off Mr. Frodo! He's working mighty hard on a very dangerous errand.
Aw, cheese off. What is he, your boyfriend? Bidibidibidi.
Don't listen to him, Mr. Frodo. He's just jealous. I guess we oughtn't expect robots to understand the platonic ideal of friendship.
I don't know; Twiki has a point. You two are awfully close.
(eyes roll up into his head, as his finger inches toward the ring)
Mr. Frodo, no!
(tackles Frodo, pinning him and holding past to his wrists to keep his ring-wearing and ring-holding hands apart, until Frodo slowly comes to)
(still pinning the weakened Frodo as he glares at the dual-entitied robot-figure)
You see? He's just dyin' to get his long phallic-shaped body part into that round, invitin', female-symbolly ring thing.
But you won't let him, I see.
Anyway, what's with you always gettin' carried hither and thither by some creepily boy-shaped robot slave?
Hey, man. We're on the level.
I have no legs! I can't walk around, let alone engage in any... untoward behavior.
Bidibidibidi. No hanky panky.
And we ain't gay!
Boys, boys. There's nothing wrong with homosexuality.
Sam... I can't breathe...
You may lie upon me, Sam. As an android I do not require oxygen. In addition, I am...
We know, Data.
Everybody just shut up! I hate you all! You're not my real family!
I never asked to be a crime-fighter!