• The Official "The Day Chris Said "Wicked Fine"" Gush Page
  • Bears!: the musical
    more..
  • Star Wars: A Dissertation
  • Violent Entertainment
    more..
  • Meet The Crazy Moon Man
  • Ask Yahtzee 2
    more..
  • Features

    Message BoardMessage Board
    CreditsCredits
    Buy StuffBuy Stuff
    Lance and EskimoL&E Home

    Friends

  • The Content-Free Vegeta Girl Zone
  • Latex Implement
    more..
  • Flash

  • The L&E Boyfriend Generator
  • The Worst Film Ever
    more..
  • Fun

  • Where Are You Going When You Die?
  • Geeko!
    more..
  • Extinct Beverages

  • Extinct Beverage: Red Bull
  • Extinct Beverage: KMX Energy Drink
  • Jacques Talk
    L&EJacquesEmail

    I know I’ve already discussed all that crap mail I’ve been receiving, but now it’s just getting absolutely ridiculous. There are just some things people don’t get turned on by.

    I received this in my e-mail and I’m absolutely shocked. Something like this is even too tasteless for me.

    Come to TerrorPorn.af!

    Nasty young terrorists! Web’s youngest suicide bombers!

    Osama bin Laden Beard Shots!

    The hottest Hardcore terrorist action on the net!

    See Sexy pictures of Britney Spears Stoned to Death!

    See Jennifer Lopez hanged!

    Jennifer Aniston tortured and mutilated!

    We have the hottest teen models stoned to death for being evil, impure, dirty, disgusting girls! And you’ll only find them here in Afghanistan at TerrorPorn.af!

    See our sexy, fully clothed teen models! Not a glimpse of flesh can be caught on these beauties.

    See:

    Hot, Sexy, Teen Girls Stoned to Death in the International Football Stadium!

    Sexy Teen Girls Stoned to Death on Camels!

    Sexy Teen Girls Stoned to Death Begging for Food!

    Sexy Teen Girls Stoned to Death for Being Teen Girls!

    Also:

    Group Pictures of Sexy Teen Girls Stoned to Death in Various Poses!

    See:

    Erotic Photos of Guns and Explosions!

    Titillating shots of masked people firing bullets up into the air!

    Video of nubile young terrorists in training! 70 minutes of hardcore training and recruitment tape footage! Bonus features include “Terrorists Gone Wild on Spring Break” video segment. See what happens when the terrorists really let their hair down during spring break in Florida!

    New and Exciting Ways to Reinterpret the Koran:

    If you read it from the start and alternate in certain patterns between certain letters and then transliterate them into English, and then move the letters around a little bit, it actually spells out something to the effect of “Kil everibody! Destriy the United Stootes! Folow Bete Midler’s Dog!” which can be interpreted as a clear enough sign!

    Instructions on how to start your very own holy war! Right in your own backyard! (Some assembly required).

    Watch sultry video of the Afghan people suffering so their leaders can go to heaven with scores of fully clothed virgins whom they’ll beat with a stick but won’t touch because women are impure, unless they’re young boy virgins whom they’ll molest because they’re already in heaven!

    See music videos of Israeli schoolchildren being shot to a misinterpretation of John Lennon’s “Imagine”!

    Read Erotic Propaganda such as:

    America Came Riding a White Camel

    or

    Let’s Blame Those Sexy, Sexy Jews Again!

    or

    Let’s Stall the Peace Process for Everyone by Blowing Shit Up!

    or

    What Happens When I Fuck This Wall?

    or

    Was It Americans or Jews or Muslims We Were Supposed to Be Killing Again? Sexy!

    HOT!!!

    If this doesn’t turn you on, you just aren’t as fucked up as you should be.

    TerrorPorn.af!

    *

    L&EJacquesEmail

  • Gullible's Travels: Day Twenty-One
  • Company X # 021
    more..
  • Who Does Paul Love?
  • The Lance and Eskimo Conversation Generator
    more..
  • Contributing Writers

  • Deck the Halls with Christmas Carol Ratings: Part I (Papa Redcloud)
  • My Fool is a Crock (Mr. Fabulous)
    more..
  • Favorites

    Polymorph Want a Cracker?Polymorph
    chefelf.comChefelf
    laurahughes.comlaurahughes.com
    Anonymous BlondeAnonymous Blonde
    Fully Ramblomatic.comFullyRamblomatic.com
    more..

    Comics

  • Lance and Eskimo Comix
  • Company X # 027
  • Lance and Eskimo in a Magazine
    more..
  • Quizzes

  • The "What 'What X Are You Test' Are You?" Test
  • Can You Take Me to the Prom?
    more..
  • Fiction

  • Origins
  • The Tragedy of Snagglepuss
    more..
  • L&E Comix

  • Lance and Eskimo Lose the Refrigerator
  • Lance and Eskimo Comix Trivia Quiz